NFL AND OCEAN’S ELEVEN

A Commentary on the Commentators

 The onslaught of changes in broadcasting America’s favorite pastime (sorry baseball fans) continues with more major changes at all the NFL broadcasters. Despite falling ratings, everyone from ESPN to CBS continues to believe that the key to grow viewership is to crowd as many analysts into a room as possible.   Multiple All-Stars in the room works when you make a movie with Frank Sinatra and the “Rat Pack” and even in the revisions with George Clooney and his pack. However, when you are trying to watch the Packers play the Bears, it’s a much different story.

John Gruden has mercifully left ESPN to become head coach of the Raiders and I am contemplating actually watching MNF again with the sound on. I know some people loved Gruden (mostly ESPN radio hosts) and his passion for the game. I do not doubt for a second that he has forgotten more football than most of us have ever known. However, his incessant rambling about each and every play made the games feel like I was listening to Charlie Brown’s first grade teacher. Gruden and ESPN would show a replay and talk incessantly about a 1^st down 2 yard carry at the start of a game like it was the super bowl. Gruden of course would go into his hyperbole mode and state “I really like this guy, he hits the B gap hard, gets hit despite the X zone triple lindy run zone blitz and still finds a way to gain 2 yards on first down, I’m telling you, this Danny Woodhead is one of my favorite players and one of the best in the league at getting 2 yards on first down”!!!!.   I was exhausted after the first play of the game listening to him. Why can’t a 2 yard run just be a 2 yard run, especially on 1^st down? As soon as he left the booth, ESPN was desperate to hire a replacement as soon as possible and gave recently retired Jason Witten $5 million per year to replace him. As of today, I have the same amount of experience as Witten as a color analyst. Who was ESPN competing with that a novice had to be given $5 million bones per year?

The big networks literally have loaded their broadcast booths and pregame shows with so many “All Star” talents that it is dizzying. FOX and ESPN have so many analysts on their pregame that we bounce from one former Jock/Head Coach to another and they offer such incredible words of wisdom that viewers could NEVER figure out: “You know J.B. I think to win today the Bears need to be able to run the ball, stop the run and cause more turnovers than the Packers” or my personal favorite: “ I think whoever turns the ball over the most will lose today”

I can offer insight like this to basketball as well “You know Dick, I think the team that makes the most defensive stops and makes more baskets will win the NCAA title game tonight” ..a broadcasting star is born!

This sort of analysis is almost as annoying as the actual game coverage in which they have 3 people in the booth competing with the play by play caller to offer insight and expertise on an incomplete pass in the 1^st quarter. Throw in 2 sideline reporters ( Pam Oliver and Tony Siragusa) who provide obvious information and interviews and the next thing you know you have nearly a dozen people in studio, in the booth and on the sideline telling everybody what we can plainly see for ourselves. My favorite is always the quick sideline interview with each head coach and no matter what the score, no matter what the game, they rush up to the coach and ask him about the first half and the answer is always the same: “ Well, we gotta take care of the ball, run the ball better and stiffen up our defense” As if all of this is not enough, we then go to the halftime show with about 7 former players standing around in winter coats offering deep analysis on a 7-3 game as each person gets 15 seconds to try and sound smart.

Maybe I am getting old, but I do long for the days of a simple pregame show with 2 people who tell you who’s injured and who is probable. I also need only 2 people in the booth to watch a game. Dick Enberg was the epitome of calling the game and just allowing the viewer to see the obvious play and obvious result. A John Madden or Phil Simms were great at providing tidbits of info regarding line play or a safety sneaking up.   Today there are so many people involved that as soon as the play is over there are almost a dozen people talking over each other to tell you how and why Danny Woodhead was able to navigate a whopping 2 yards on 1^st down. Sometimes less is more with sports. ESPN is bleeding financially, yet they gave Jason Witten $5 million per year to retire from the NFL and replace John Gruden. Do they really believe the people of America will watch Seattle vs Oakland week 9 because of their color analyst? We watch for the game not the 11.

-BSB