The Match between Tiger and Phil does not live up to expectations

The Friday after Thanksgiving “Match” between Tiger and Phil was highly anticipated and it sure was close, however, it certainly did not live up to expectations in many respects.

Phil won the Match on the 4^th extra hole- the 22^nd hole- with a 4 foot birdie putt to secure the victory and the $9 Million winner take all prize under the lights at the Shadow Creek Golf Resort in North Las Vegas. Tiger missed his 7 ½ footer for birdie short and right prior to Phil draining the clinching putt.

The afternoon was supposed to be a birdie fest between these two iconic legends of the game complete with clever needling and banter and side wagers. Unfortunately the scoring wasn’t very low, the banter fizzled the later it got in the day and the unimaginative side wagers dried up way too soon.

Bleacher Report carried the event, priced at $20 but after numerous technical difficulties most cable outlets and BR offered the PPV for free. The announcing team of Ernie Johnson, Peter Jacobsen and Darren Clarke tried hard to dramatize the event and the play by play but there was only so much pumping up they could do. It was an unusual format as both players wore microphones and the viewer was to be treated to the overly hyped on-course conversations between the competitors and their caddies. Ernie, was a bore, Jake is knowledgeable and interesting, and thankfully truthful but Darren Clarke should have stayed in the pub.

The on-air hosts of the event, BR’s Adam Lefkoe, who???, Charles Barkley, Samuel L. Jackson and golfer Pat Perez were decidedly annoying, Perez admitted he knew very little about what either men were thinking and Lefkoe added virtually nothing but fluff in terms of information. Barkley and Jackson rambled on like two drunk guys at the bar reliving stories of how each one did this or that. Then this commercial free PPV event turned into a 5 hour long commercial for Capital One. Gee, Charles, you were so funny when you made that last commercial, blah, blah, blah…Unbearable after the first few laughs. It was nice of Gaylord P. Fokker to stop by the set and regale us with his golfing experience while shamelessly promoting his new Showtime series. Remember- Commercial free PPV, presented by Audi.

Sir Charles and Samuel L. “I’m in every movie ever made” Jackson consistently talked over Tiger and Phil the few times they conversed and may have actually said something to get excited about. How long can you take Barkley being a clown?

There were supposed to be a lot of cool side bets and on screen stats and odds to make this or that. Nope, the 1^st hole where Phil bet $200K he’d score a 3, was lame, he left his birdie putt short, really Evelyn??? Tiger lipped out for par on the second and Phil was 1UP after 2. Halves at 3, 4 (both birdied), 5 and 6 before Phil put it in the bunker twice at 7 evened up the match. Phil then went up on 9 when Tiger three-putted the hole from 40 feet. Phil won $50K- big deal when Phil, was closest to the pin (38 feet). The Head Bozo picked up some change with the (+170) for Phil to win the front wager. More boring halves and missed putts until 12 when Tiger took his first lead 1UP with a wedge he stuck two feet for a bird. On 13, Phil won closest to the pin again 5 feet to 10 feet and nailed the birdie to go AS again. On 15 Phil chipped to within a conceded par and Woods bogeyed. 1 UP- Phil.

At this point we heard the first Baba Booey. There were not supposed to be any spectators, however as the match progressed, more and more elite dribbled onto their course surrounding the players with cell phone cameras and annoying selfies. Maybe 1000 special people were afforded the opportunity to witness this average game of golf. It really distracted the scene with these desert coach wearing rabbits scattering all over the place to maximize their entitled view.

A lame hole for both on 16 was followed by a 21 foot chip in against the collar to square the match at 17. Finally, some action. At this point, anything would do.

For the back nine, the friendly banter was silenced and we were left with only Charles, who said he could have beaten both guys, and “that this was some lousy golf”. At the par 5, 18^th, Phil could have won if Tiger missed an uphill 5 footer, but Phil, the gentleman, conceded the putt. He “didn’t want to win that way”. The hosts ran out of material and decided then to concentrate on tweets from celebs and other pros and we had a dreadful back-and forth tweet war between Charles and Justin Verlander. So funny I could barf.

The 2^nd time playing 18, they both missed birdie putts in the dusk so the match was moved to a makeshift tee on the practice putting green to shoot 93 yards back to 18 under the lights. On 20 and 21 Tiger could not even find the green from 93. He was now, visibly annoyed with this crappy set-up and uninterested, EVEN with $9 Million on the line! A 93 yard wedge off the putting green for $9 Million? You cannot be serious!

Phil, on 22, hit a nice wedge to 4 feet while Tiger missed an 8 footer for birdie. When Phil drained it for birdie, it was thankfully over, six hours after the pregame started. Bozo cashes again with another (+170) on Phil to win!

Although the golf was reasonable interesting, the banter and egging on was not, the hosts and egotistical aforementioned blowhards made me look for the TV brick and the unfulfilled promises made the eve3nt thoroughly unspectacular.

They could probably get it right in the future with Dustin vs. Rory or something, but these two dudes are past their prime and as we found out that Friday, just aren’t that interesting.

BTW, Tiger wants a rematch. Ho-hum, let another Bozo cover it and I’ll read his column.

-HB