Where is Charlie Hustle?

Recently this Bozo made a pilgrimage back to the motherland of New York and took some time to see his family and friends and take in the fall colors and crisp air of autumn in New York. While it was fun to reminisce for a few days, the 40 degree mornings reminded me that I better hustle my butt back to Florida before I become pasty white like everyone else up there. One of the high school buddies I met up with recently asked me why the Bozos don’t write more about baseball and I quickly realized that it’s because baseball in its current form sucks! Baseball was once the number 1 sport in America but has continued to decline year after year for a variety of reasons; however the number one reason might be the fact that it is not a sport anymore. Don’t believe it?

The Yankees are on the war path to spend all that Steinbrenner family money and even they are having a hard time with free agency. Years ago, Whitey Ford of the Yankees made the remark that a rookie named Pete Rose was “Charlie Hustle” because he ran to 1^st base when a walk was called. Not just any game, but in a SPRING TRAINING game! Today we have superstars in regular season and in playoff games that won’t run to 1^st base for a deep fly ball. Machado is the new generation of splendid athletes like Bryce Harper and Yasiel Puig, who train like full backs and then run like a punter after a kick. They swing at the pitch as hard as possible and either hit a home run or strike out, which makes no sense to anyone who grew up playing little league baseball. When you are down 3 runs in the 6^th, a single HR is not the goal for little league coaches, but to get some men on base and pressure the pitcher. Instead the players today seem more content to hit a solo HR and go back to the dugout.

The Yankees are having a hard time getting their hands around free agent Manny Machado’s $35 million per year price tag when he admits that ‘Running is not my thing”. For that statement alone, MLB should apologize to Pete Rose and put him in the Hall of Fame out of embarrassment. In what world does a man ask for $35 million per year and admit that I don’t always play hard? $35 million per year is not incentive enough to play hard, and get an extra base? For $35 million I would beat up the Dali Lama in front of my pastor with a sock full of marbles and French kiss Harvey Weinstein in front of my mom at Christmas dinner! How bad can it be? Gargle with some rubbing alcohol and go to confession on the spot for beating up the Lama! The NY Mets recently traded for the lazy Robinson Cano and his $25 million per year contract. In the release they did admit that he doesn’t always run too hard when batting. Since he only makes $25 million per year, I may have to lower my bar and only beat up a nun and French kiss that dude Joy Behar from “The View”!

MLB is discussing ending the defensive shift in which all the players on the field basically move to the other side of the field. Why would you end this? If Charlie Hustle was playing or managing, he would have a bunting clinic in which you literally get easy base hits merely by putting the bat on the ball. It is amazing to see NOBODY on the 3^rd base side and a batter continue to swing away as hard as he can. In football, when a receiver is uncovered on one side of the field the QB calls an audible out of the bomb they called for the other side and quickly throws it to the uncovered side of the field. Why does baseball not do this? If Charlie Hustle played today, my guess is he would have had 6,000 career hits just working the shift. I keep waiting for a cagey manager and GM to come in and realize they can load up the bases on these defensive shifts if they would just make their players bunt or even put a slap on the ball to one side or the other. The mere fact that they Yanks are debating whether to spend $35 million on a player who doesn’t give much effort tells you everything you need to know about the state of today’s game.

The money in baseball has reached epic proportions and in order to pay these players they have raised prices to a game to a mortgage payment. Is it too much to ask a player like Machado or Harper to run when you hit a ball to deep center field? Is it too much to ask one of these players to learn how to bunt and take the easy base when they are shifting defensively? At some point fundamentals need to come back to MLB and if I was a team, I’d try to get Pete Rose to come to spring training and teach the bunt and the slap single.

-BSB